Why developing the effective communication skills is so important? As to me, that is because it is essential to achieve my own goals. There are three reasons for this.
First one is that I won’t be able to materialize to get desired career without good communication skills. For example, I have to success in both job interview and essay of aimed organization. We need those skills to let the examiner know our ability and enthusiasm. Furthermore, it helps me to make good connection with people related to the organization and that can be really advantages in job hunting.
The second reason is that effective communication assists me to get the most of educational chance such as university in which I am just studying. Although I don’t think just making as much friends as possible is make campus life better, it will do good for me provided I have the good interactive techniques such as sharing lecture notes and discussing tutorial topics. Also, the skills are important to get the good relationship with lecturers and that is necessary to get the greatest knowledge out of them.
The third and (probably the biggest) reason is that good communication techniques are indispensable for me to get a girlfriend (and even wife!). It is true that ordinary Japanese men of older generation like my father are not good at communicating with their wives and they tend to think that they have tacit understanding. But, in today’s world where women has getting more power in both the office and home, and international marriages are quite common, we no longer make it possible without effective communication to get the best partner and keep being in good with her.
For these reasons, good communication skills are critically important for me and I’d like to get such techniques in this class as well as improving my English skill.
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I was just reading today's newspaper - it was about trying to promote Sinagporeans to have more children. Seems like maybe if we promote effective communication, just maybe there might be more marriages and children around? Though I think that is just being hopeful.
But, on a more serious note, I do believe that effective communication is important between a husband and wife, especially in today's society, where women are now more empowered and hence have the ability to make decisions. We women have more say as to how things go, and as such, communication is definitely important as to how the household is run and how to make a marriage an effective partnership.
With a marriage that has two people of different mother tongues, effective communication is even more crucial and thus takes even more effort.
Anyway, just to end off, I am sure that with hardwork and determination, all of us in the class will be able to learn something beneficial to each of our own needs.
I have just one comment. I agree that the older generation of Asian men (including Singaporeans) tend not to be good at communicating or expressing their love explicitly for their wives. However, the tacit understanding between the couple may prove to be wonderful at maintaining the family’s harmony. Divorces, which are common nowadays, are almost unheard of in the older generation.
Tacit understanding between couple & the passive love are just silent forms of effective communication as shown by the older generation.
I actually think that the reason why divorce rates are lower in the older generation is actually because of the mindset of that generation. It was considered taboo and people who were divorced were ostracized.
Hi Kazu, I also think that it is important to have effective communication during courtship and in a marriage. Many times couples decide to get married without really knowing each other well but just because of romantic feelings or even obligation. They end up having difficulty living with each other because of different perspectives and, more so, because they have not learnt to communicate with each other and are unable to resolve the conflicts that arise. One obvious difficulty in communicating in such situations is that there is always a gender difference. The same words used could mean different things to a lady and a gentleman, for example, the ‘uh-huh’ response. Good thing is: it is not impossible to learn to communicate effectively with the opposite gender. (Gambatte!)
Changing subject, my personal opinion about the ‘success’ of marriages of previous generations is more similar to Dominique’s. People those days (Asian cultures) do not go through with a divorce because they find it humiliating not to be able to sustain their marriages. They tend to suppress their unhappiness and just try to live with it for the sake of their children. At times, their marriage is just a shell; they are married but their relationship can be worse than that between strangers. It is difficult for children to live in such families. Providing a loving environment for their children is probably one reason why parents should learn to communicate with one another and work through their differences.
Hi Kazu,
From my viewpoint, one of the obstacles to effective communication is that one party is unwilling to talk it out. This is quite common in relationships actually. Normally, the girls like to talk about problems they think are occurring in the relationship, but sometimes guys prefer to brush off the topic. Perhaps it's their ego or something like that. But keeping quiet when the girl has something to say is not beneficical to the relationship. So I think that both parties have to be open to discussion for effective communication to take place.
Actually Teresa, as some friends pointed out to me, I'm not so sure that girls actually talk out their problems with their other half. We girls, when angry and asked about it tend to say, "I think you should know," or "Go think about it, it'll come to you". Although I am not saying that all girls are like that.
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