I like traveling abroad and often talk or negotiate with local people in souvenir shop, hostel and taxi /motorcycle/bike driver. The interesting point is that the friendliness and way of negotiation varies between countries.
For example, Nepalese people are honest (same as
In contrast, in India, most of the people who try to talk with me are cheater and tell me the price about 3 times higher than the usual price but they are so friendly that its hard to distinguish the true friendship from superficial one(I heard Chinese way of negotiation is similar). For example, it is quite common that one man brings me to their friend shop and asks them to sell the souvenir in discount price for me. But in the situation like this, the price is still steep in most cases.
In my opinion, however, Indian people are naturally really friendly and like to talk with anyone else because
For example, when I was joining the local one-day tour in
Another symbolic thing is that they call me “my friend”, even I met them a few minutes ago. In fact, they talk and behave as friend with me. What I surprised was that many people asked for giving one of my pen for the memory; one guide asked for even my t-shirt. It’s partly because they are not so better off as people in developed countries. However, the conversation itself was really fun as they talk with me as friend.
In conclusion, we had better know the general nationality of various countries and be careful not to misunderstand their friendliness in order neither to be cheated nor to ignore their true friendship.
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4 comments:
Kazu,
I see from the examples you gave in your blog, as well as, those you wrote as comments for mine that you have a lot of experience with intercultural communication.
Indeed, understanding cultures is important for successful positive relationships. It helps us not to get cheated, build true friendships, get ahead in intercultural businesses and not get upset with people unnecessarily.
I recall a trip I made to China. My friends and I had planned some activities for the university students over there. However, though they promised to attend, a few came late and most did not turn up. I was upset, wondering what we did wrong. Then a friend, who has been there for some time, shared with us that their ‘yes’es may not be true and that they are not very conscious of time. It is not really a personal thing. That made me feel better. If I had known earlier, it would have saved some bad feelings.
Hi Kazu,
From my experiences with interacting with Indians in NUS, I have the same thoughts as you. They speak very well, appear very friendly and nice to you. However, they don't deliver what they promised. Like you, sometimes I feel cheated. Unpleasant experiences like this make me lose interest in interacting with them, and when I have to interact with them, I am very cautious over what they say. I know this sounds bad, but I cannot get used to their culture of "sweet talking" (if this is the correct way of putting it).
Therefore, when people from different cultures interact and do not adapt to the other party's culture, it is often hard for the conversation to continue. People may see the other party's actions as an offence. If the misunderstanding is not cleared, the friendship may be sacrificed.
>Sheila
Yes,I think concept of time varies between both countries and persons as well.
We Japanese people use Honne(本音: one's true feeling, opinion）& Tatemae（建前:one's role-appropriate face to the world） and in this situation chinese people said a kind of tatemae.
>Teresa
I see how difficult to get along with Indian people.
I think it is quite natural that people who have same ethnic origin gather even in foreign countries (like China town and Little India) because it is comfortable to spend time with same ethnic people and misunderstanding hardly happens.
But,I like to see people from different culture (including Indian people) simply because it is more interesting and stimulating than to see those of same culture.I feel really happy when I get to know new culture and be destroyed or broaden my sense of value.And maybe this is essential for the world peace in this globalized world to some extent.
So,you may feel better if you try to have fun when you communicate with people with different culture.
Hi Kazu,
I like your attitude of accepting difference cultures and also taking the extra effort of understanding people who are different of you.
I am sure with that positive attitude of yours towards other people. You will go far in your life.
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